Why it’s hard to be human (or, how to let go of fear).
My lord, is it hard to be human. I learned this very clearly while on the radio. I was the co-host and co-producer of a love and relationships internet program for many years back in LA called Finding Cupid with David Cruz, and it seemed all our guests were having the same troubles: balancing and finding their way through the tumultuous journey of being a human being. And then I said it out loud, on the radio, for the very first time. It’s Hard To Be Human. And the truth resonated. And my company name and subsequent podcast was born.
How do we do this thing, this act of being a human? How do we make sense out of this ever changing experience of our…humanity. That is, of course, if we’re paying attention. If we’re willing to struggle; to do the work. Ooof. A tall order sometimes for sure. How much easier might it be to be a domestic housecat; being fed, taking naps during the day in the sun. Oh, how I often wished I was born into another form! It took me a long time to come to terms with my own human animalness. It took me a while to understand that it’s Hard To Be Human, and that’s it. If you’re doing your work, if you’re finding some joy in the struggle, you’re on the right path. You’re doing a great job.
These elements, issues, psychological experiences enthrall me and pushed me to leave the radio world of love and relationships to want to dig deeper; to delve into the source of our pain and struggles – our humanity. Hence, in a special studio space in the heart of Prague, the first ever pilot of the Hard To Be Human Podcast was born. Hard To Be Human is the umbrella brand name of my business. And when I interview folks for the podcast, the intention for it – as well as for my public speaking business – remains the same. To share the truth, vulnerability, frailty, and thereby transformative strength of the human condition, with all its ups and downs, in a manner that resounds with authenticity and relevance.
My business is growing, but my podcast is sleepy. While engaging in my reality about why the podcast has been a silent stepsister to my public speaking persona, the truth is is that I’ve learned about my own limitations, how long it can take me to learn, and how beautifully I thrive within a collaborative and cohesive environment. And if I don’t have this perfect soil for my development, I can, at times, shrivel on the vine. The gorgeous folks who all helped me with my pilot episode, all have rich and vibrant lives of their own and thereby needed to grow in directions different than being my co-host or my sound engineer. So, I let her sleep. Dealing with my insecurities about how to make it viable. People asking about it and me having nothing to say. All the while, looking at my reasons why I have yet to make it more active; a more vital part of my enterprise. And I’m here now to honestly say, I’m looking at my fear and finally seeing it for what it is. A kind reminder that a human is often not ready until, well, they are.
I needed to grow into a more confident place, where I could really stand WITH my courage, feel it inside me and welcome it without question, and therefore with conviction put my HtbH stamp on my own work. Two years ago I was reconfiguring the broken stained glass of my life into a new frame. I was still finding my voice post-divorce, post the loss of my father, with my new life in Central Europe, my new life as an expat. Sometimes it takes a while to find your way. It just does.
It’s now 2019. I’m witnessing my business start to slowly flourish due to increasing my public Hard To Be Human presence through workshops and promotion. And I now have three more podcast recordings ‘in the can’ that just need a little love, a little focused attention by me, and my Nikki “No Fucks” attitude to help get it out of bed and bring it to life. And the best part is that due to the culmination of all my years of being an Artist, a Producer, and an Educator, I believe in trusting the process. I wasn’t ready before. I had needed a team. I still do, and yet I am now living in the clarity to know I can also do it on my own. The fear that once protected my brain and my abilities no longer serves, and my voice and the voice of those I’ve interviewed are stronger than my need for collaborative perfection. So, I’m getting there. And the technology rises to me and my challenges. I am learning. I am changing. I am evolving. As, hopefully, we all are. So, get the coffee ready. Soon, the Hard To Be Human Podcast will be fully awake and ready to go.
– Nicole J. Adelman, founder Hard To Be Human; Prague Bettie
Hard To Be Human is an international Public Speaking enterprise founded by Nicole J. Adelman. We teach professionals in all fields, specializing in non-native English speakers, the skills of Rhetoric, Elocution, Enunciation, Speech Writing, and how to release, unlock and fully express their English. We focus on preparing our clients for public speaking events such as corporate presentations, TED talks, and auditions at all levels. Working with Hard to be Human means immediate results; greater confidence, increased knowledge of English and how the language works, and the subsequent joys that occur with learning these skills.